Finding Your Voice in the Year That Tested You
Dec 30, 2025Some years don’t just test our endurance.
They test our ability to speak.
To name what isn’t working.
To say no when we’ve spent years saying yes.
To stop shrinking in rooms where our voice deserves space.
This past year asked that question repeatedly.
Not loudly. Not dramatically. But persistently.
Where are you still quiet when you should be clear?
When Survival Teaches Silence
Early in my life, silence felt safer than speaking.
Coming out of homelessness at seventeen, my confidence was fractured. Trauma has a way of doing that. It doesn’t just disrupt your environment. It disrupts your internal narrative. You start questioning your instincts, your intelligence, your right to take up space.
I learned quickly how to read rooms. How to avoid conflict. How to defer to stronger personalities. And for a long time, that adaptation looked like maturity.
It wasn’t.
It was survival.
This year, that old pattern resurfaced in subtle ways.
Leadership environments where toxicity lingered longer than it should have.
Moments where accountability was avoided to keep the peace.
Situations where clarity would have helped, but comfort was chosen instead.
And while I didn’t regress, I noticed something important. Even when we grow, old habits can whisper again when pressure rises.
That’s not failure.
That’s information.
The Cost of Not Speaking Up
We often frame assertiveness as confrontation.
It isn’t.
Assertiveness is alignment. It’s the ability to express truth without aggression and boundaries without guilt. And when it’s missing, the cost shows up everywhere.
In the Mind, confusion replaces clarity.
In the Body, stress accumulates quietly.
In the Heart, resentment grows where honesty should live.
In the Spirit, purpose dulls because integrity feels compromised.
This year, navigating complex professional transitions forced me to confront that reality again. Mobile crisis work is unpredictable by nature. It requires decisiveness, emotional intelligence, and clear communication under pressure. Ambiguity doesn’t just slow progress. It creates risk.
Avoiding hard conversations doesn’t preserve energy.
It drains it.
And over time, that erosion matters.
Assertiveness Is Not a Personality Trait
One of the biggest myths around assertive communication is that it’s reserved for confident people.
It isn’t.
Assertiveness is a skill, not a disposition.
I wasn’t born with it. I built it. Slowly. Awkwardly. Through trial, error, and plenty of uncomfortable moments. Through leadership roles where speaking clearly wasn’t optional. Through learning that being respected often requires being understood first.
This is where the Five Pillars of Tiger Resilience intersect powerfully.
Purpose anchors why your voice matters.
Planning helps you choose when and how to speak.
Practice builds confidence through repetition, not bravado.
Perseverance keeps you steady when pushback comes.
Providence reminds you that alignment creates opportunity.
Assertiveness isn’t about dominating conversations.
It’s about standing in your truth without apology.
A Year That Demanded Clarity
This year didn’t allow for passive leadership.
Between professional restructuring, personal health challenges, and a near-death experience that stripped life down to its essentials, the message was clear.
Say what matters.
Say it with care.
Say it before resentment replaces respect.
Surviving something that close to the edge changes your tolerance for silence. When you realize how thin the line between presence and absence truly is, you stop postponing honesty.
You don’t become louder.
You become clearer.
Bringing Your Voice Into the New Year
As we move toward a new year, the pressure to reinvent can overshadow a simpler truth.
You don’t need a new identity.
You need a more aligned one.
Ask yourself:
- Where did I hold back this year to avoid discomfort?
- What conversations am I carrying unfinished?
- Where would clarity serve me better than compliance?
Assertiveness isn’t about fixing yourself.
It’s about honoring yourself.
And when your voice aligns with your values, resilience stops being reactive and becomes intentional.
The Tiger doesn’t roar constantly.
But when it does, it’s unmistakable.
Carry that energy forward.
๐Please leave a comment or reply on how your voice (belief) changed this year.
Rise Strong and Live Boldly in the Bond of the Phoenix. ๐ ๐ฅ
Bernie & Michael Tiger
Tiger Resilience Founder’s
Post written by Bernie Tiger
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