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The High Agency Mindset: How to Stop Feeling Stuck and Start Taking Control

confidence habits self esteem tiger resilience Mar 18, 2025

Have you ever felt like life is just happening to you?

Like, no matter what you do, do things stay the same? Bills pile up, relationships feel stagnant, work feels unfulfilling, and that sense of control over your own life seems to slip further away.

You’re not alone—but you don’t have to stay there.

The difference between those who shape their destiny and those who feel trapped in a cycle of frustration often comes down to one thing: Agency.

This is where the High Agency Mindset comes in.

What is High Agency Thinking?

High Agency Thinking is the belief that you have the power to shape your life. It means you don’t wait for permission, external validation, or perfect circumstances—you take responsibility and act, no matter your obstacles.

People with low agency often say things like:
❌ “I’d love to do that, but I just don’t have the time.”
❌ “I can’t get ahead because my boss never gives me opportunities.”
❌ “This is just the way things are. I can’t change them.”

In contrast, those with high agency say:
βœ… “I will make time for what matters most.”
βœ… “If my boss won’t promote me, I’ll develop my skills and find new opportunities.”
βœ… “I can change my situation. It won’t be easy, but it’s possible.”

High agency doesn’t mean ignoring reality. It means owning your response to it.

History is filled with high-agency thinkers—people who refused to let circumstances dictate their futures. From Nelson Mandela, who maintained his vision even in prison, to John Paul DeJoria (Paul Mitchell Beauty Products), who overcame poverty to build an empire, the ability to take ownership is what separates those who succeed from those who stay stuck.

But what does this look like in real life?

Michael & Bernie’s Stories: Choosing Agency Over Circumstance

πŸ”₯ Michael’s Story: Taking Control After a Setback
Growing up as an athlete, Michael faced a moment that tested his agency in the most brutal way—a serious hunting accident that could have derailed his future. Instead of succumbing to self-pity, he made a choice: This will not define me.

He rebuilt his strength, pushed his limits, and went on to win a high school sports contest—not because it was easy, but because he took ownership of his recovery. His body healed, but more importantly, his mindset became unshakable.

πŸ”₯ Bernie’s Story: From Powerlessness to Leadership
In his early corporate career, Bernie once felt like he had no control—trapped in a cycle of insane work hours, workplace politics, and a lack of real purpose. It wasn’t until he shifted from blaming the system to owning his path that things changed.

By seizing control of his skills, networking, and mindset, he rose through the ranks into top leadership roles in two separate industries, even managing a clinical team at a psychiatric hospital (presently). His career didn’t change because someone handed him an opportunity—he made the choice to act.

How to Cultivate a High Agency Mindset

  1. Take Responsibility for Everything in Your Control
    You don’t have control over everything, but you do control:
  • Your habits
  • Your responses to challenges
  • The actions you take daily

Start shifting your language from:
🚫 “I can’t do that because…” → βœ… “I will figure out how to make this work.”

🚫 “I have no time.” → βœ… “I will prioritize what matters most.”

🚫 “This is just the way things are.” → βœ… “What is one thing I can change today?”

  1. Set a Small, Non-Negotiable Daily Challenge
    High agency is built one action at a time. Pick a small habit that reinforces your power to make things happen.

βœ… Choose something measurable:

  • 10 push-ups every morning (physical discipline)
  • Writing 200 words daily (creative agency)
  • Reaching out to one person for an opportunity (career agency)

The key? You do it, no matter what.

  1. Stop Seeking Permission
    A major trap of low agency thinking is waiting for someone else to give you permission—to start a business, pursue a dream, or make a change.

High-agency thinkers don’t wait. They act.

Ask yourself:
πŸš€ “If no one could stop me, what would I do today?”

Then do it.

  1. Reframe Challenges as Opportunities
    When something goes wrong, you have two choices:
    ❌ Complain and stay stuck
    βœ… Look for a way to pivot and grow

The best leaders, athletes, and entrepreneurs turn setbacks into stepping stones. Every challenge you face is an opportunity to develop resilience and problem-solving skills.

Your Challenge: Take One Step Today

High agency isn’t a theory—it’s a practice.

Right now, think of one area in your life where you feel powerless.

πŸ’‘ Is it your career? Health? Relationships? Confidence?

πŸ“ Write down one action you will take today to regain control.
It doesn’t need to be huge. Just something that proves to yourself: I have the power to act.

Then—take that step. Move. Choose. Decide.

That’s how agency is built.

πŸ”₯ Leave a comment or reply—what’s the one thing you’re taking control of today?

Yours in the Bond of the Phoenixβ€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€― 

Bernie & Michael Tigerβ€―πŸ―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€― 

Tiger Resilienceβ€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€―β€― 

 

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