The Lost Art of Fun: Why Adults Forget How to Play (and How to Get It Back)

Twelve years.
That’s how long the average adult goes without picking up a childhood hobby again. Fun doesn’t vanish with age — we just stop letting it in.

Pain

This is for the ones who’ve traded laughter for late nights at the office, who can’t remember the last time they felt truly playful. For those who’ve filled calendars with deadlines but can’t find space for joy. If you’ve convinced yourself that fun is frivolous, you’re not alone.

I learned this lesson from two very different people.

My wife’s grandmother, Jenny, was the matriarch — a resilient woman who came to America from Poland as a child, survived the Depression, and built a business when times were hard enough to break most people. To her, hard work was gospel. The equation was simple: sweat + grit = survival.

On the other side was my friend Jeff. He came from family wealth and leaned hard into recreation — skiing, boating, long vacations. Jenny had a name for guys like him: “Good Time Harrys.” She’d shake her head, half-laughing, half-critical, whenever one of us carved out time for play.

For years, I sided with Jenny’s worldview. I wore my 10–15-hour workdays like armor. Work first, play later. But later never came. Looking back, the ROI on all those extra hours? Pretty lousy. Sure, I gained discipline and survival skills, but I missed out on what really sticks — dinners with family, weekends away, belly laughs with friends.

The truth I see now is this: fun isn’t a luxury. It’s self-care. It’s resilience.

The Shift: Reclaiming Fun as Essential

Fun isn’t just for kids. It’s not wasted time. It’s a reset button for the body, mind, heart, and spirit. Without it, the wheel of life doesn’t roll smoothly.

Here’s how The Five Pillars of Tiger Resilience help us reclaim the lost art of fun:

Purpose 🎯 – Fun reminds us why life is worth living, beyond survival.

Planning 🗺️ – If you don’t schedule joy, it won’t happen. Block it like you would a meeting.

Practice 🔄 – Build small, consistent rituals of play into your week.

Perseverance 🏔️ – Protect your fun time with the same tenacity you guard your deadlines.

Providence 🌅 – Trust that joy is fuel, not distraction — it prepares you for life’s opportunities.

Phoenix Steps: Reclaiming Your Fun

🔥 Step 1: Identify your “Good Time Harry” moments. Where do you crave joy but silence it with guilt?
🔥 Step 2: Choose one childhood hobby to revisit — music, art, sport, games.
🔥 Step 3: Put it on the calendar. Treat fun as a commitment, not a reward.
🔥 Step 4: Share it. Fun doubles when experienced with others.
🔥 Step 5: Anchor in affirmation: “Fun restores me. Joy makes me stronger.”

Caution

🚫 The biggest trap? Believing you’ll make time for fun after the work is done. Later rarely arrives. Responsibilities multiply. Energy drains. Without scheduling joy, you risk reaching the end of a chapter — or even a life — without the memories that matter most.

The Four Domains of Fun

Body 💪 – Play relieves tension, lowers stress hormones, and boosts energy.

Mind 🧠 – Fun sparks creativity, curiosity, and flow.

Heart ❤️ – Shared laughter bonds us more deeply than shared work.

Spirit 🔥 – Joy reconnects us with meaning, reminding us life is more than survival.

Journal Prompts

• When was the last time I had real fun — not fake fun, but true, energizing joy?
• What hobbies or passions from childhood have I abandoned, and why?
• What’s one activity I can put on the calendar this month just for fun?
• How would my body, mind, heart, and spirit feel if I treated fun as fuel?

RISE

Jenny’s grit kept her family alive. Jeff’s leisure reminded me of what life could be. For too long, I believed fun was indulgence. Now I see it for what it is: strength, connection, and resilience.

If you’ve been living by the motto “work first, play later,” it’s time to flip the script. Schedule joy. Make space for laughter. Reclaim the lost art of fun.

The Tiger grounds you in structure. The Phoenix renews you with joy. Together, they remind us: fun isn’t childish — it’s essential.

📍Please leave a comment or reply on what you do for fun.

Rise Strong and Live Boldly in the Bond of the Phoenix.

Bernie & Michael Tiger         

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