The Unsung Hero of Human Connection: A Thanksgiving Message

Effective communication

In a world of confusion, how powerful can communication really be? A better question might be, what is the power of a spoken word - it is significant. We easily overlook the most fundamental aspect of our interconnections, and communication is the most essential aspect of human interaction. This very mundane skill can still present challenges, even for the best of us. Effective communication is genuinely at the heart of success or failure as a result of what is being communicated. I feel this is especially true at this time of year when we look at Thanksgiving as an opportunity for us to rekindle old relationships, heal old wounds, and put aside petty differences with the expectation that connectedness will unite us all.

When thinking about effective communication, I love to reference the lyrics of one of my favorite Genesis songs, Land of Confusion: "There are too many men, too many people making too many problems, and not much love to go around. Can't you see this is the land of confusion?" Now, let us imagine a world where we can communicate effortlessly and have the ability to bridge the gaps between our minds and hearts. In this realm of effective communication, misunderstandings will dissolve, conflicts will dissipate, and new ideas will ignite like sparks in the night. From this, we can find relationships flourishing, businesses thriving, and a united society, all fueled by the power of our ability to communicate and listen actively to each other.

Listening to understand and not to respond is at the heart of effective communication. Suppose you consider the simple biology that we were provided two ears but one mouth at birth. Now imagine using this in proportion to our connection and communication with each other. It's easy to see that we would listen twice as much as we speak. I have found that one of the most fundamental communication challenges comes from the perspective of the individual we're listening to. Too often, many of us, myself included, will enter into a conversation with our thoughts, processes, and autobiography. Here, the challenging aspects of listening to understand somebody comes into play.

The issue at heart here is that we need to be patient and mindful of our present moments with individuals when we are communicating to be effective in our listening capacity by giving them the space and freedom to express ourselves without judgment. Of course, this can be easier said than done, but it does not take a lot of practice to start working on our skill set when it comes to being patient when we listen to others. I've also found one of the most significant challenges to this is our intentions. If we approach any issue, concern, or relationship with an actual carrying and empathic belief in the other person, we have the ability to want to understand them; thus, our intentions are pure in that we want to better that relationship.

When communication breaks down, these consequences are far-reaching, as we can see throughout our world today. We can trace almost every sickness and dysfunction, including wars, strife, political disagreements, and differing beliefs, to that single word of communication (Or lack thereof.) So, how do we master effective communication? Well, it is an ongoing journey and a continuous process of self-discovery and refinement in our capacity to want to understand somebody else. It does require a conscious effort and a willingness to step out of our comfort zone, and that commitment can be a great learning experience - either through success or failure.

Let's consider some of these highlights to understand how we can develop our skills:

• Clarity: This is how we speak and articulate our thoughts and feelings openly and honestly to avoid misdirection or dishonesty.
• Empathy: Simply seeking to understand somebody without responding to them works perfectly for this word.
• Active listening Is where we need to be present and engaged in attentive listening, giving undivided attention which comes with the patience for allowing the other person to know and feel, more importantly, that they are understood.
• Respectful dialogue: One of the serious deficits in our world today is that we do not approach each other respectfully because we see them through our own autobiography. Approaching a conversation with an open mind will foster a safe space for exchange for both parties.
• Nonverbal cues: We need to be very mindful of our body language, facial expressions, and the tone and cadence of our voice. Nonverbal cues tell a lot about our communication style and intentions.
• Practice makes perfect: To be effective as a communicator, we need to consistently work on this as an exercise no different than if you were taking 10,000 steps daily to improve your overall health. We need to take in that exact equivalent and our ability to engage with each other (remember the biological ratio of two ears and one mouth.)

As a reminder for us all this Thanksgiving, we must understand that effective communication is not some magic wand that will solve all the world's problems, but it is a start and has the power to transform lives. We cannot change anyone but ourselves, but our ability to influence is exceptional. Through effective communication, we can utilize that skill set of influence to help make changes for ourselves and to empower others. Let us embrace effective communication, and let's be the unsung hero of the human connection, which is the key to unlocking a world of possibilities.

Peace and Blessings,

Bernie Tiger